Well, I’ve truly realized how disgustingly poor my command of the language called “English” is. My vocabulary sucks; I write with lots of grammatical mistakes and I’ve been writing in what some might call “Engrish” (Read on for more evidence.). As such, it might be better if I write in some proper English for now. I ain’t good in Chinese; I’m not good in English and I’ve never even completed half of my Japanese course. Maybe I should learn 133t speak and excel in it.

And this might or might not be a so-called “revival” entry as I am still unsure if I have FTP access to the host. Frankly I need to spend more time to do some overhauling of the site code/database etc. Everything is so messed up. I don’t even like Bleach now anymore. I don’t like Gundam Seed Destiny either. The One Piece design is messed up. Nothing works right. RSS failed for god knows why. My trackback implementation is close to a white elephant – others can ping me but I can’t ping them. The livejournal integration is done hurriedly.

Questions might be flowing non-stop in your head as to why I became so unlike myself today. Genius Ho pointed me to a blog of a senior of his. I was taken aback by the language he writes in and I had to use Google’s handy “define:” tool to check the meanings of some of the language he uses – not something you would do for every site you frequent.

Apparently, he knows Xian Liang. I am ashamed to say that I did not even give a damn care about him to visit him in hospital even though I did not know him well. I was only concerned with enjoying myself and did not bother to take note of what’s happening around me. I’ve repeated the same mistakes over and over again.I call this the “Heck-Care-and-Play Syndrome” or the HCPS. Guess what? I’ve just ended another round HCPS. I come out of this and tell myself everytime that I should not be doing this and yet I still repeat the same mistakes over and over again.

I realized most of my entries have been boring and about everyday life and isn’t even worth the time and effort to read. With my usage of super small font size (my preference actually) and the bright background colour, it makes it worse. Most of the entries have been composed within 5 minutes. You reap what you sow . A 5 minute entry cannot be any better than a chronology of happenings. If you want some better entries, you have to spend time thinking and writing. (Honestly, if my browser messes up and clears this entry, I am going to cross over the River Styx of Sanity.) This reminds me that it’s time to end the long overdue holiday mood I had for the first three months.

I guess no one will be reading this entry and probably will only serve as a reminder to myself to not repeat my same mistakes over again.